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    Author Message

    Nicki

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    11 posts

    Location: Brazil
    Occupation: Drayman
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    #1388   2008-01-06 13:19 GMT      
    Basically I am fed up with people taking advantage of my kindness.
    A (so called) friend has been bothering me so much it is now literally driving me mad. She wants to tell me her problems, she visits or phones me every day (usually more than once) and this has been going on for about 8 months.
    I cannot find it in me to say "Go away, you are driving me mad!" which is what I would like to say.
    She is very demanding and is eating away at my self esteem.
    How do I find some strength? Are there any self-help books out there? She is consuming my life : (

    Hope you can help......before a murder is committed!

    Dinosaur

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    Location: Nauru
    Occupation: Contract Manager
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    #1389   2008-01-06 13:27 GMT      
    Instead of listening make excuses like i'm going out and she'll eventually get the message =/

    ScardyCat

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    Location: Maldives
    Occupation: Interior designer
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    #1390   2008-01-06 13:29 GMT      
    I have talked to a few friends who said they read Dr. Phil's books, they said that they have helped them a lot during hard times...

    Dinosaur

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    #1391   2008-01-06 13:29 GMT      
    I wish you would leave us alone. You are bothering us with your question. Please try to understand the angst it is causing us.

    Do you understand?

    Virus

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    Location: Thailand
    Occupation: Astrophysicist
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    #1392   2008-01-06 13:42 GMT      
    well seems like ur own goodness is killing u bt u need not kill either ur goodness or somebody else.i m sendin u certain links they might help.good luck.

    EgyptianWonder

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    #1393   2008-01-06 14:37 GMT      
    Read Susan Jeffers "End the Struggle and Dance with Life". It's life changing. You can access it through her web site. Good luck!

    Highway

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    Location: Nepal
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    #1394   2008-01-06 14:56 GMT      
    Here are some that made a lasting impression on me and may help you with your situation:

    'Boundaries' by Anne Katherine
    'How To Have That Difficult Conversation Youve Been Avoiding' by Henry Cloud
    'Anger: How To Live With And Without It' by Albert Ellis

    SymphonyOfSound

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    Location: Cote D'ivoire
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    #1395   2008-01-07 11:12 GMT      
    I haven't read it but " Diary of a Nobody" might be a good start. The title says a lot!

    ThePacifier

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    Location: Cape Verde
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    #1396   2008-01-08 00:58 GMT      
    Hi Buddy

    Before I share with you a self help book that has been
    useful for me.

    I would like to share with you my personal opinion after
    reading your question.

    It seems to me the friend of yours has given you her absolute
    trust and you are the only person for her to fall back on and to confide in.

    This I would like to Congratulate for making a difference in someone's life. At the same time, I could empathise with you when your friend's dependence on you seems too much and you needed your pwn space to breathe.

    Personally I do not think that you have a self esteem issue.

    You are a kind and a sincere friend who doesn't want to hurt the other party.

    What you may be wanting so much now is a space to breathe.

    I would suggest you to sit down with this friend and have a heart to heart talk that there are other priorities in your life that needs your attention too.

    Find avenues for her, perhaps she is lonely and you are the only person accesible to her or she is comfortable with.

    Ironically, you could purchase a self help book for her.

    One book that I will definitely recommend is called
    "The Secret".

    I watched the dvd before reading the book and it talks about the law of attraction, what you are thinking, you are attracting.

    If you are looking for more self help resource, I am a student of Success University where they have seminars and materials all available to you online for you to master your life.

    This is the link to Success University, you can get a discount off this link: http://jychia.successuniversity.com/specialoffer/

    But honestly, I can sense that you are a really kind person and you may be right that she could be taking advantage of you but from your friend's perspective, you are most likely her saviour.

    Let me know if you need more help, I would be glad to assist.

    Cheers!
    JY Chia
    Your Self Help Motivator
    http://www.SelfHelpMotivationBlog.com
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